My Reflections

New Year has begun!

2010-01-19T22:59:00.000-08:00

Wow, time really flies. Last few months were super busy with church work. Anyway, as the beginning of a new year, I pray that this year will be another year of surprise.

As some of you has guessed rightly, I failed to complete my target of book reading. I target to read 26 books last year, but only manage to reach 10 books by 31st of December. Well, I admit my defeat ... (mourn for 1 minute) ... okay, let's move on.

This year, I have no time to loose. My future is at stake. I am giving all I have into education. There are few deadlines I must meet, or else I am .... dead ... really dead ...

What are the deadlines? Can't let you know. Top secret. What you can know is that those deadlines is about education.

Hope you will forgive me as I have not much time into blogging. Okay, got to go already. See you next time.

Leadership Nugget

2009-08-07T22:00:00.000-07:00

Recently i set a goal to read up to 26 books by the end of the year. It is a crazy target to achieve, with my crazy schedule and heavily demanded job. Yet, I know that I am responsible for my own life, and being an educator, I need to teach myself. To be true as an educator, to believe that the world will be better with wisdom shared, to upload the mission of a teacher, I must first be a student to develop a learning habit that will eventually lead me to the destination that I want to bring others along.

So, I decided to initiate the self-improvement training on myself, and see the result of it for myself.

So far, I have read 6 books, and starting my seventh book this week. Books that I read came from all sort of genre. I have to train my mind to understand knowledge of all genre, to see development in a more holistic way.

The seventh book that I am reading now is written by Dale Carnegie, and the title of the book is "How to Win Friends and Influence People."

The first chapter explain the first principle in relationship: Don't criticize, condemn or complain. It is human nature to protect themselves from physical and emotional harm. Therefore, when a person make a mistake, the person will put up his/her defensive barrier, and will try to justify his/her action. I call this as "Adam's nature". When Adam and Eve fall into sin in the garden of Eden, the first thing Adam did when God asked him was to justify his action by pointing the problem to Eve.

However, when we criticize or judge the person, it actually enforce the barrier. This cause the person not willing to accept his/her fault and turn away from any rebuke. Moreover, usually when we criticize, we allow our emotion to express freely without self-control, and we will end up pouring our anger, frustration, hurts and pain to the person who make the mistake. At the end of the day, not only the person did not learn the lesson, but the relationship became sour and broken.

However, this does not mean we should allow mistake to pass by and pretend nothing has happen. We need to correct the person in away that is not rude, but with love and understanding. This is where self-control is heavily required. To be able to confront the situation with a calm emotion is very difficult. It require us to put our emotion down, and think in rationally on what way can we help the person improve.

Frankly speaking, I don't think I have such capability to control my emotion when someone in my team make a mistake. Yet, I see that by continuously re-evaluate our respond in rebuking someone will help us to develop a new habit. This new habit of building another person will soon replace our bad habit of fault finding.

Lead in love and not with fear is the highest call of leadership.

Being relevant to the society

2009-08-03T18:29:00.000-07:00

This few weeks, the word "Relevance" has been ringing in my ears. Every where I went, I found this word appear. Even in my small group, I began to share with my college members how the youth culture has developed and how far the church is away from engaging the culture.

I understand that being relevant does involve risks, and there is no fine border line between relevance and worldly. All I could see is that if we continue to reach out to the youth with our traditional method, we might eventually become another Europe, loosing the generation.

The whole cycle of postmodernism has already begun whether we like it or not. I see no point in defending the "methodology" of reaching youth, or pointing fingers on any party that does not support the idea.

As this age has begun, we have to admit the fact that youth today is different from youth 5 years ago. If we are not able to break from the traditional perspectives, we are in danger of not being relevant to the people we are trying reaching.

However, there are the group who try to be relevant till losing their own identity. They are well blend into the society, but at risk of losing the very call of being set apart for.

It is never an easy task to be spiritually set apart and culturally relevant. Yet, I see no excuse for not risking for God. I remember once my lecture in Bible school said, "if every one plays clean and don't want to get dirty, who will be the hand of God in the dark and dirty world?"

I will take the challenge to exploring further, how a Spirit-driven person should engage the society, and how God can lead us to be spiritually set apart yet culturally relevant. God please guide.

Leadership Reflection

2009-07-27T18:43:00.000-07:00

I am going to start a series of reflection on leadership. This reflection is spring out of the last Eagles Leadership Conference that I attended in Singapore. Some of the sessions really reveal some "hard" reality of churches today. But there is at least one session that I think is not really beneficial, at least to me.

Nevertheless, no matter what, there are gems of truth hidden in each sessions.

For each reflection, I'll make it short, taking the core teaching of each session, and ask some reflective questions for us to think about. Hopefully as we continue to struggle with those hard questions, our mentality of leadership change. When our thinking change, our behavior will change as well (I am a strong believer of Cognitive-Behavior Theory).

Here is the first reflection on the first session of Eagles Leadership Conference 2009.

Topic: Loving People, Delivering Performance

Speaker: Rev. Peter Chao

Leadership is more than job delegation. It is not a dead mechanism or an autocrat imposing fear to get things done. In fact, leadership is highly emotional, and the most powerful leadership is nurture in love. Jesus Christ demonstrated the highest level of leadership, which is self-sacrifice and self-giving to all mankind. The hard question for us to struggle is:

The current organization that we are leading, is it driven by love or fear? People working around us, are they working because they are compelled by love or fear of becoming jobless?
What are the ways that we can promote love in our leadership scenario? How do we love the people we are leading more and more? How can we create an environment of love in our workplace?
Are we willing to take the risk, to be humble enough to admit our vulnerability to the people we are leading? Can we admit our mistake and stop covering them from the people we are leading?

Day 14 - Back to Malaysia

2009-04-13T20:56:00.000-07:00

This morning, we had a wonderful worship service in Agape. I thought there will be only a few of us coming to church because most of our members have gone back to their hometown. Yet, quite a number turn up in today service.

We have a wonderful time fellowship after the service, and Sothy brought me out for lunch. We went to a Taiwanese restaurant and have some Chinese food.

Then by 2.00pm, they send me to the airport. Everything went smoothly. But as you can guess it, the flight delay for an hour. So, I waited there from 3.00pm till 5.00pm before I step into the plane.

When reach Malaysia, the weather is not too good. Heavy rain in the airport. Anyway, by God's mercy, we landed safely. I got down and pass through the customs without any problem. In my bags were 8 mangoes and 2 back of rice.

Then finally I meet my family. Complete my mission in Cambodia and reach home safely. First thing I did was to give a nice hug to my girlfriend. Miss her so much. Then went to the Mamak stall and had a good Malaysia dinner.

I find that this trip has been a blessing to me. In one way or another, I have learned my weaknesses. I found that I am not that independent after all. In many times, I will feel fearful. I have to learn how to overcome myself for the mission that has been prepared for me.

I hope that my journey has encourage you to take part in a mission trip. It is not that difficult nor it is easy. One thing I know, you will definitely learn something new. May God bless you and have a wonderful day.

The End.

Day 13

2009-04-12T01:21:00.000-07:00

Well, today I went to Central Market again to buy some more stuffs for my friends and family. I am blessed to have Sophy to go with me cause you will be paying double or triple if you bargain as a foreigner. Got what I wanted and head back to Agape.

Don't have much to do, but simply resting and preparing to go back to Malaysia tomorrow. Time past really fast and it is faster when you are mising somebody. I think this trip has add a lot of values to me and to the people here.

In the evening, we had dinner together. I suppose to go night market with Sothy, but we had a long dinner, so I decided to cancel it. We talk and talk and talk as we eat our last dinner together. We have spend 2 weeks together, and I am glad that everything went smoothly and God has been great to us.

Although I am in Cambodia, I am very much aware of what is happening in Kuala Lumpur. I hope the choir sing their best and many people will be touch by the message. Sunday will be Easter for Malaysia and I pray that our church will be jam packed with people.

In Cambodia, I don't expect that to happen for tomorrow cause most of the people has already left, went back to their hometown for New Year Celebration. Nevertheless, hope for the best, and God will do the rest!

Today is extremely hot as I couldn't really sleep. Spend my night browsing the net cause really up here. Or maybe I am too excited to go back to KL tomorrow.

Nevertheless, may God bless everyone who follow this blog so far, and hope that my journey in Cambodia gives you some ideas of what a short term mission trip is. It is not as difficult as you think, if you are here for short term.

I am really thank God for all the missionary who work hard in Cambodia. If you plan to do long term mission work here, frankly, it is not easy. Nevertheless, God has been faithful to us and to the people here. I pray that what we are sowing today will bear much fruits, that could even surpass what we have been doing all this while. With all the visions, strategic planning and training in Cambodia, I can see that God is doing something wonderful for this nation.

Well, tomorrow I will be back to KL. See you guys there in KL tomorrow.

To be continued (Last episode next) ...

Day 12

2009-04-10T08:26:00.000-07:00

Time pass really fast. Today is the 12 days I am here, which means three more days I will be back to Malaysia. I miss my girlfriend a lot, and got a lot to tell her.

Today we have a short reflection sharings in our teachers' devotion. We share our happiness, frustration and sadness in First Kid Cambodia.

Then in the afternoon, I with a group of teachers went out to have ice-cream and tagaluk again. This time we go to another shop, which is cheaper and taste the same. We have a wonderful time fellowship together.

Then we also have our meeting, carrying from last week, we continue to improve the ministry in Cambodia.

At night, we have small group at Han's place. He has a beautiful house. We has pizzas and pasta for dinner. "Nyum Nyum!" Then follow by a small group meeting.

I am quite tired by now. Add the pictures another time.

To be continued ...

Day 11

2009-04-09T06:48:00.000-07:00

Today, I am given to priviledge to attend Cambodia Bible Institute Graduation Ceremony. Their ceremony is similar to our BCM Graduation Exercises. Just that everything is in Cambodia language, including the missionary will also speaks Cambodia language.

I finally meet up with Pas. Kala (I am not sure about the spelling). It seems she knew a bit about me, being the young pastor. Not sure is good or bad, but leave it to her.

In the morning, I gave the teachers a simple study test on the four lessons that I have taught them in the last few days. Well, it was a fun test, cause I design the test in a way they never thought off.

I also attended Sothy's small group again. Going to miss them a lot when go back to Malaysia.

To be continued ...

Day 10 - Shopping Day

2009-04-08T07:02:00.000-07:00

I have been here for ten days. Another fascinating day have just begun. I think from now, I will cut off all the usual routine and gives you the highlight of the day.

Today devotion topics for the teacher is "Baptism". We had a revision on baptism, and I promise to give them a simple study test tomorrow.

After devotion, I went out with Sophy and Thavy for breakfast. Oh, I love the fried Cambodian noodles. It is like our "Yee" noddle in KL.

Today, we also went to four different places for "SHOPPING"! First we went to the Russian Market to get all the Cambodian Shirts for my family members. Then we went to the Central Market. After that we went "Orusai" market. Finally we ended at Sorya Shopping Mall for lunch.

After lunch, head by to Agape and rest. So, today is Shopping Day for me.

Didn't manage to snap pictures today, cause I was too busy buying stuffs. Tomorrow I will be attending Cambodia Bible Institute graduation. Looking forward to tomorrow.

To be continued ...

Day 9

2009-04-07T07:07:00.000-07:00

Today, early in the morning, follow my usual routine, fix my Milo and then have the devotion time with the teachers. Today topic is about "Faith". After devotion, went back to my room to do some reading. Today, I read on "Pastors' Temptation". Really draw my attention how a pastor can fall into, especially missionary.

After reading, I continue to design the new believer for Cantonese Service in First AG, KL. I am trying to design a simple and practical course as a follow-up program for the new believer. I find that Purpose Driven Youth is using "Fresh Start" program for new believer. Spend an hour studying it and modifying it to fit into our context.

Well, after that, feel a little boring, I turn on the computer game. Have a short game on "Dota" (The only game installed on my computer). After game, I went to next door to have my lunch.

After lunch, have a nap. Then continue with another game. After that, prepare to go to the Starbuck-alike shop (is called Terrace Cafe) for a drink and wifi. Sothy came to meet me, and we went to Terrace Cafe together. We had a good chat and we left at 3.45pm.

I went back to my room, sweep and mob the floor. Then clean the toilet and do my laundry. Sweat flows like river, and it feels so good.

After that, take a shower, and went to next door to get ready for dinner.

During this week, many students already went back to their hometown. So, not many came for class today. At 8.00pm, we had our dinner. Natasha, Charleen and I have a short chat. Then by 9.15pm, we went back to our rooms.

Thank God for protection and He is so good to me.

To be continued ...

Day 8 ...

2009-04-06T08:41:00.000-07:00

So fast I have been here more than a week. Time flies with all the traveling. However, today time seems to be slow.

I suppose to travel down south with Sothy to a place call Kampong Soam, but something happened with his wife, so we have to call off the trip.

As usual, I wake up at 6.00am. Prepare myself and go to the teachers devotion at next door. Today topic is about "Repentance". A serious yet essential topic that is fundamental to our faith in Jesus Christ. After the devotion, I went back to my room.

Do some reading on my computer. But after that, I realize I don't have anything to do next. I remembered there are some video files in my portable hard disk. So, I plug my hard disk into my notebook, and watch the entire series of Prison Break Season I.

Then at 12.00pm went to next door for my lunch. After lunch, came back to my room, and rest. after a short rest, I watch a series of Keyboard Training. I guess this is my only time, seated on the sofa and went through some keyboard training videos. After that, I sleep like a pig till evening.

Then at 4.00pm, I decided to walk around the town. So I went out to the street and start walking to nowhere. As I walk, I continue to pray and watch. I walk almost an hour, then walk back to Agape Church. I missed one of the junction, and I got lost on my way back. Anyway, in Phomn Phen, you can't hardly get lost actually cause there are only a few main roads. What I did was to come back to the main road to find my way. True enough, I found my way back to Agape safely.

I went back to my room, feeling hungry, cooked instant mee for myself. Then while eating I watched John Mayer concert and listen to Pastor Kong Hee sermon on "The Basic Human Needs" until dinner time. Then have dinner at next door. After dinner, came back to my room and start surfing and blogging.

Sophy and her sister went back to Battambang do some registration. No one to bring me out. My camera is out of battery again. So got to buy battery tomorrow. Everything went smoothly, thanks for your partnership in prayer.

To be continued...

Day 7 - The Lord's Day

2009-04-05T08:55:00.000-07:00

I wake up at 6.00am. Still early for the Sunday Worship which start at 8.00am. Get myself ready and prepared for the sermon. Then at 8.00am, went down for the worship service. The weather seems not too encouraging as there were dark clouds all over.

Arrived at the worship service, we had Holy Communion and I preached on the resurrection of Christ. Praise God, the weather turns to be good and we have a wonderful time of fellowship after the service. Not to forget, mangoes were served as refreshment.

Then after the service, we prepared to go for baptism. This round we have four people decided to baptize! Praise God! We went to the nearest resort which is the Long Beach Resort to use their swimming pool for baptism. It was a great moment for them. After baptism, they will swim in the pool. But it was too hot for me, so I decided to go back to church.

Sophy and I together with the Baptism Candidates

Baptism at the swimming pool.

After baptism, I went back to church. Got my notebook with me, and I walk to the cafe (starbuck-alike), and enjoy myself there. It is a Sunday, and my another half day break. Spend 2 hours there, enjoying the air conditioner with my ice choclate while surfing the internet. What a day!

Then around 2pm, my eyes getting tired. Went back to Agape, and lay my head on my bed. Sleep till 4pm, I woke up and find things to do. Listen to one of my sermon collection, a sermon by Pastor Kong Hee on "Word of God". Got to keep myself spiritual nourished and build up.

at 5.00pm, we have a small group in Agape with the church members and staff. They are going through a series of new believer lessons. After that, I went back to my room and prepare to go for dinner. I asked the church staffs to go dinner together for tonight.

We decided to take a "Tuk-Tuk" to Sorya (the first shopping mall). Had our dinner there and walk about in the mall. As usual, I don't buy anything from the mall, but two of our sisters bought cloth for themselves. After that, we head back with "Tuk-Tuk" as well.

It was a fun journey and we enjoy ourselves. Back to our Agape, I decided to watch a movie with them (so call bonding the relationship). So, we borrow a vcd from neighbour and watch it. It was a Thai-Korean movie, but overdub with Khmyer. I am guessing the whole show, but the act is quite easy to catch. They really enjoy themselves.

After the movie, everyone went back to their rooms to rest for the day, while I am blogging here. The weather for tonight is cooling. Hope it will rain tonight.

Day 6 - half day rest

2009-04-04T07:18:00.000-07:00

Another adventure is going to begin. This morning, the worship team is going to have their bible study and practices. I woke up at 6.30am because no teacher devotion for today. Get myself ready, and as usual, fix myself a cup of Milo. Then went down to meet the worship team at 8.00am. Their worship team is guided by Charleen and a local music producer. In term of music skills, I think they are still learning and trying to be better. Since I will be here for 2 weeks, can't do much with the team, but only advice them not to neglect their spiritual life as worship team members.

Then at 9.00am, I have the honor to lead a new teacher to Jesus Christ. Immediately, the new teacher together with 2 more people attended baptism class with me. Then later, another young man attended baptism with Sophy. All together there will be 4 people going to baptize tomorrow. Praise God for that!

Then after the classes, they actually planned to go for lunch fellowship at a boat. To my surprise, they actually rent a boat nearby "Ton Le Sap" river, and bring our food there. It was a nice experience to have our lunch fellowship on the boat together. We have fun time there. The charges is USD$30 per hour. The boat can fit in more than 30 people.

There are boats for rental. USD$100 for a day trip.

Me taking picture with church members and workers in the middle of Ton Le Sap River.

Then by 12.00pm, we are back to Agape Assembly. The weather is extremely hot, and cause me to be drowsy. I took a nap, and wake up at 2.00pm. Work on my sermon till 5.00pm. Then went down to chat with Sophy and some other sisters. They were preparing to attend the wedding dinner as well. For ladies, they will wear as though they are going to ballroom dancing. For men, wear as thought you are going to see the prime minister.

My bad, I didn't bring my leather shoes. So, I wear my chinese shirt, my brown slacks and sport shoe (Ouch!). So, while waiting for Sothy to come and pick me up, Sophy invite me to have local cuisine opposite the church. Well, it is little duckling egg. The duckling actually is already in form, and they steam it. It taste quite nice, although you can see the little body parts of the duckling, but looks like food to me. Sophy said will buy more "funny" stuff for me to try, like snake and tarantulas?

Oh poor little duckling... But it is tasty.

At 6.00pm, Sothy arrived to pick me up. We went to the wedding dinner at a restaurant nearby the river. Everyone was well dress except me. In Cambodia, they are very particular with the dress you wear for occasion such as wedding. They will compare their dress that determine their status and fame. I became the joke of the day. Well, I don't really bother anyway, just eat and go. The food is not too bad, but the portion is quite small. In Cambodia, usually they give USD$15 as "ang pow" to the marriage couple, so I just follow.

This is what you are expected to wear for ladies.

My good friend Sothy and I. He is the one who brings me around after David left.

After the dinner ended, Sothy send me back to Agape. Tomorrow I will be preaching, so better sleep early tonight.

To be continued ...

Day 5 ...

2009-04-03T07:40:00.000-07:00

Another exciting day began to embark at 6.00am. Today I woke up at 6am and have a short body workout. Then fix a cup of Milo and went to First Kid for teachers' Devotion. I have been thinking of giving some variations to the teachers devotion, so I decided to make Friday as Prayer Meeting.

After having a prayer meeting with the teachers, I went back to get ready for village visitation. Sothy invite me to join him to visit a small group which located in a village. I agreed because I would like to know more about their lifestyle in the village. But before the visitation, I brought Sophy out for breakfast. Then at 8.30am, Sothy arrived.

We are on the motorbike for more than an hour to reach our destination. My butt almost flatten (already so flat, now is like Sony Wega). The village life is simple and the people are extremely friendly. Spend some time there talking with the villagers. I think Sothy's church is trying hard to plant a church there. However, I think they really lack of resources and strategic plan in building up the community.

The village is quite poor, and lack of medical support. Any doctors out there willing to contribute your expertise?

They eat all kind of food. Snake, eel and frogs.

Pre-school started by Sothy's Church in the village.

Then around 10.30am, we leave the village and heading back to town. We went to KFC to have our lunch. The KFC is started by Malaysian as well. Good business, the food similar to Malaysia KFC, but the chickens are smaller.

After lunch, we went to another shopping mall which is just nearby. It was the second shopping mall. It was better than the shopping mall that we went yesterday. I bought nothing there as well, cause nothing special, whatever is there, I can get it in KL in a much cheaper rate.

The second shopping mall in Phonm Phen

After that, Sothy send me back to Agape and invite me to a wedding (his church member is getting married tomorrow). Well, I have not seen Cambodian wedding before, so I agreed. Tomorrow 6.00pm he will come and fetch.

I went back to my room, took a shower (I am full of dust, travelling for 2 hours on a motorbike, what you expect). Then take a short nap. At 3pm, I went down to check out their mime practice. They are doing very well, and the mime is very good. Then at 4.00pm, head by to my room for a final round of prayer. These few days the weather is not consistent, and keep raining. Praying very hard for good weather.

Good Friday program start at 5.00pm. The weather is very good. No rain and is not too hot either. Praise God for good weather! By 5.00pm, only a few people arrive to our church. However, at 5.30pm, it is full. According to Sophy, we have more than 200 people turned! Praise God!

The service is at the front of the church. Jam packed!

We have praise and worship to start off the good Friday service. Then follow by 2 mimes and song presentation. Cambodian really can act and sing, they are really good at it. Then by 6.15pm, it is my time to preach the Word of God.

I give it all that I have. At one hand, trying to keep the message simple, at the same time to keep my exposition correct. At 6.45pm, I give the altar call challenge. I challenge those who would like to accept Jesus into their life to respond by raising hand and moving to the front. When I first invite them to raise their hands, many hands were raised. Then when I call them to come to the front, some hesitated, but many came. Because it was so many and we didn't expect it, so we didn't really count the number of decision makers. But roughly, around 15 people to 20 people. Really praise and give thanks to God for His work among the people.

People are responding to the Word of God. Inviting the God of Peace into their life.

I asked Sophy to lead them in prayer in Cambodia language. God is working in their life. Then we end with another song presentation by a teacher name "Von". After that, Natasha prayed for the food and everyone move into the church for dinner.

People rush to the altar to accept Jesus as their God.

The food are excellent! We have beef curry with Cambodia mee and bread. Too bad that my camera no battery at that moment, so didn't manage to get some captions. We didn't actually expect that much of people, but praise God, our supply of food is more than enough to feed everyone. There is left over that we can give to the street kids.

After dinner, they started singing and dancing. Oh, Cambodians really love music and dancing. I am thinking that we should organize a singing or song composing competition next year. It will be a great event for them.

Then finally at 10.00pm, we clean up everything and back to our room. Everyone is so happy. I think tonight event is historical for the church. Everyone give their best, the presentations were great, the food were excellent, and everyone is dead tired. But what I hear at the end of the day? "Tonight is wonderful", "I am so happy tonight", "Although is tired, but it is worth it", and more positive comments. I think this is what Bill Hybels said, they found a holy discontent, that they are willing to sacrifice for the cause of it. And the best part is, most of the work are done by the local people. I see a great potential in the young adult here in this church.

Tonight shall sleep well, and wait for another exciting day to come.

To be continued ...

Day 4 ...

2009-04-02T06:44:00.000-07:00

Today is the fourth day in Cambodia. Still fresh and healthy. Don't worry about me, I am adapting to the environment quite well. Beside the bugs keep targeting me, everything is just fine.

Today journey is quite something. My good old friend, Sothy promised to bring out today. So, I wake up early in the morning at 5.30am to prepare for devotion. Actually I couldn't sleep very well cause the coffee yesterday keep awake till 2.00am. After I wake up, I have a simple body workout. Got to keep my body strong and healthy. Fix a cup a Milo and took a cooling bath.

6.30am, I had the devotion with the teachers at First Kids. Started Lesson 1 of Basic Principles of Church Life. Then after the devotion, went back to my room to prepare for the day trip.

8.30am, Sothy arrived at my place, and we went for breakfast together. Tried the "egg" mee, quite nice, like our dry mee in KL. Then we go to our first station, the "Killing Field". This was not exactly the killing field which is quite far from the town. But this used to be a school, but during Poh Pot regime, it was converted into a prison and torture chamber. It is a freaking place.

This board was place in the front of the School

Behind is the prison block

Don't want to write so much on it cause I am blogging at night now. Then after that we go for lunch at a Cambodia Coffee House. Cambodia rice is really nice. It is not too soft, nor too rough. After lunch, we went to the largest shopping mall in town. Walk through the whole shopping complex, but some stuff and we head on to our next destination.

We then proceed to the King's Palace. Not like Malaysia Palace where the tourist can only view from the gate, the Cambodia Palace is actually open for tourist to enter. It is a large palace, and we are allowed to enter the common area only. But it already took our entire afternoon.

It was a grand palace. Gold and Silver were everywhere.

Nearby the Palace there are some local cuisines. Guess what is it?

This clock is at the center of Phnom Phenn.

After that, we go back and have a short rest. Well, I am so tired and took a short nap. In the evening, I went to join Sothy's small group which is nearby Agape Church. After the small group, we are suppose to have a wonderful dinner together, but unfortunately rain pour down like no body business, so we just went to a nearby restaurant and had our dinner.

We talk and talk till the shop is emptied. Then, no choice but we got to leave the restaurant. The rain is still drizzling, so we didn't go for Tagaluk. Head by to Agape to finish my day.

I am glad to hear the struggles of my good old friend. To hear and understand the AG situation here in Cambodia. I pray that tomorrow Good Friday service will be a powerful service. Do pray for us that the weather will be great!

To be continued ...

Day 3 ...

2009-04-01T08:09:00.000-07:00

Well, I have been in Cambodia for more than 48 hours. Early in the morning at 6.30am, I follow the First Kid School Van to Bro. David's office. Have my breakfast there together with the staff. Then, continue with a devotion time. After the devotion, my mission to the village church began.

Bro. David, Sophy and me depart from the office to our branch church in the village. It took us some time to reach to the village. Our church is actually located at the end of the village. It is a nice and serene place. The church is surrounded with paddy fields.

Our Church in the Village

There are plantation in the Church

Bro. David share with me about the future plan of that church. It certainly have great potential for that small little church at the end of the village to become a powerful village model church.

There is a pond which needed to be filled.

After visiting the church and the pastor, we continue our journey to Cambodia Bible Institute which is nearby the Airport. When we reach there, is around noon. We meet up with Pastor Ken who is the Deputy Superintendent of the Assemblies of God Council Cambodia. We had a long discussion, sharing thoughts and ideas. After that, we went to a shop nearby Agape Assembly for lunch.

Bible Institute of Cambodia

After lunch, we went back to Agape. Took a short rest, then have a meeting with First Kids Staffs and Church Staff, I call them the powerpuff girls (Charleen, Natasha, and Sophy). Cause in reality, they work non-stop like powerpuff girls. We had a long meeting, discussing the matters of the church and school.

Then after the meeting, I went to my room to pray. After prayer, again I clean up my room. Sweep and mob the floor nice and clean. Feel a little hungry, cook the mee cup.

Suddenly, Bro. David turn up. Two of us went to the starbuck-alike and enjoy the air-cond and wifi there. By 7pm, we went back to Agape for our dinner. After dinner, Bro. David brought us to a place for "tagaluk" (i am not sure the spelling, but that is how it sounds to me). Basically is a ice-blended fruit punch. Excellent taste!

Free wifi. There is Caramel Frappucino as well.

Tagalok. Mine added Durian as well.

Now that I am blogging, the weather suddenly change, and the storm seems to be coming. It is cool and windy. It is so nice, and I am feeling the breeze that is flowing from the window in front of me.

Tomorrow morning I got to teach the teachers on Basic Principles of Church Life. Got to sleep early then.

To be continued ...

2nd Day in Cambodia

2009-03-31T06:48:00.000-07:00

Wake up 6am (Cambodia Time) and wash up. 6.30am devotion with the First Kids teachers. They were having exam (in devotion, no kidding!) and I was just loitering around. Then 7.30am have my breakfast. After breakfast, relax a while. At 9.00am had devotion with some of the church members. They are going through the book of Romans, and they spoke in Cambodia language, and I interpret in the Spirit.

My Breakfast. Very delicious with Egg and "Siew York". The rice is very nice here.

9.30am, Bro. David brought me to the City Centre. 12.00pm, we went to Bro. Han's office and had our lunch with him. After that, Bro. David took me to the new Phnom Pehn, where our church actually bought a bungalow land there. Reach back church around 2.30pm.

There are statues in every town. Statues are the monument that represent township.

This is the largest Casino here. Open by Malaysian!

Back to church, I went to my private space up stair and clean the place up. Wash every single dust out of my lounge and clean my toilet. Then have a short nap.

Then, 3.00pm have a meeting with Sophy regarding the Christian Education of Agape Assembly. Then eat fresh and sweet mangoes. After the meeting, I went to find Sothy. Hang around in Sothy church for a short while, then back to Agape Assembly by 6.30pm.

Is fruit Season! The mangoes are fantastic!

6.30pm meet up with Rev. Chay. David, Sophy, Rev. Chay and I went to a Starbucks-alike coffee house to have a chat. After that, went back to Agape Assembly for dinner at 7.30pm.

Look familiar? Look closer.

Additional "Char Siew" for dinner. The pork also better than Malaysian pork.

Now at 9.00pm, blogging at my living room. No sign of green bugs yet. Maybe because of the weather change, tonight seems much cooler than yesterday.

I plan to sleep here in the living room for tonight cause my room is really hot.

So far, my stomach is behaving well, and health level is good.

From what i see today, there is a huge potential for Cambodia.

To be continued ...

Finally Arrived!

2009-03-30T07:18:00.000-07:00

Today 30th March 2009, 4.30pm (Cambodia Time). The flight got delay due to some issues, but nevertheless, I am able to reach safely.

The whole journey started this morning when i depart from my house at 11.00am (Malaysia Time), and reach KL Central at 11.30am. Then had my lunch with Uncle David at Subway. Depart from KL Central to LCCT (AirAsia Airport) at 1.00pm. Reach the airport at 2.00pm and check in by 2.15pm. Then wait until 3.15pm finally got into the plane. By 3.45pm the plane take off. Spend 1 hour 45 minutes in the air, and landed in Cambodia International Airport at 4.30pm.

First Time taking Air Asia International Flight

Air Asia is no longer free seating. Must be God blessing, my ticket is actually a hotspot ticket.

My seat is just beside the window. So nice to see the view of Phomn Phenn from above.

To me, this place resemble Thailand. The traffic is busy, and the weather is hot. So far, I am still ok with the weather. No problem with that.

I am standing in front of Sothy's Church

I reach Agape Church, our daughter church in Cambodia. Except for the air vandalation, everything is good. The room for me is so nice.

They have Chinese Restaurants here!

Now as I am blogging, i find many green colour bug lurking around me. Not too sure what are they, but got to get rid of them tomorrow. Althought i have killed plenty of these greeny bugs, but there are still more to come.

Tonight i guess got to sleep early to suite their time.

To be continued...

New Movie. Must Watch!

2008-12-16T00:29:00.001-08:00

Last few weeks my family and I went to my Dad's studio for photo taking. We have some wonderful time there. I am still waiting for photo. But here is a shot after edited by my good friend.

Remember, 29 February 2020. Primier show tickets can get from me. First come first served basis. Hope that you are still around by then.

Finally Graduate from BCM!

2008-12-03T17:46:00.000-08:00

Last Tuesday was our Graduation Day for Class 2008. The theme for this year is "Finish Strong." What a wondeful message for our graduates for this year. Every now and then we hear minister give up on the ministry for one reason or another. Such news challenge the every Christian to think again, whether we are able to be faithful to God till the end. Nevertheless, God is not deaf to all these circumstances, and He had given us the promises for us to fulfil our call in this life.

I really miss the college and the people in it. Leaving the college means a lot to me. It is the beginning of my journey of ministry, and transitioning my learning style. Now, I need to learn by experience and observation in the harvest field.

Well, just talking will be boring. Here are some pictures for you to see, enjoy!

Pictures of myself :P

My Families

Throw it!

Here are just some of the pictures. My dad and my brother took more than 400 pictures on that night itself. Perhaps after I have sort it out, will post more pictures.

Worship Expression

2008-11-20T22:34:00.000-08:00

The Bible say sing with joy and adoration to the Lord. Here is some captions of Worship Expression. Enjoy!

I personally enjoy watching the worship expression, I guess God must be enjoying it too. It shows the sincerity and "mystical" connection with God. Somehow, this is beyond human understanding to analyze our expression of worship. Although there is no physical object of worship, but everyone seems to worship in a same direction. The invinsible God is real and tangible. The presence God can be senses with our heart.

Bible Study on Micah

2008-11-20T09:54:00.000-08:00

Hey folks! I am currently going through the study on the book of Micah in my dad's cell group at my house. The book of Micah is an important book especially in our time where we face spiritual tsunami cause by so many factors. The book of Micah answered many tough questions including:

How should Christians live in a Non-Christian nation? The world is getting worst, what is God doing? How come those people who sinned against God does not receive their punishment? What is prosperity gospel?

We have completed three sessions, and we have four more to go. I encourage you to follow us as we study along the book of Micah. Feel free to post your question about the book of Micah at the comment section of this post.

My New Home Recording Mini Studio!

2008-11-16T17:51:00.000-08:00

Finally, I able to assemble some simple set up for my mini studio. Thanks to my dad for the support and lending me the money to purchase my desktop. Here are some pictures of my mini studio.

My New ViewSonic 19' Monitor. Slotted in the middle is my Motif XS 7. Don't have the money to buy studio monitor yet, so for the moment I will be using my Altec Lansing ATP3. Hopefully God will bless me with the monitor soon.

This is my System Unit (SU). I bought the cheapest casing around. But don't judge a computer by its casing. I installed Core 2 Duo 3.0 Ghz and 4 Gb of Kingston Ram. So far, no problem and everthing run smoothly.

There is my Echo AudioFire 4 soundcard. This is a professional soundcard that really expensive. I am doing my project with this small device. The sound is clear and crisp.

At the moment, I am doing some tracks for my church christmas programs. I will be busy with this machine for some time. I thank God for all the blessing.

Graduation Photos

2008-10-19T20:26:00.000-07:00

Last Sunday, my girlfriend (Vicky) had her convocation at UPM. The place was packed up with people. I had the opportunity to celebrate her graduation with her family. Recently, I took my graduation photo. Ha! Now put my girlfriend graduation photo together with mine.

I am graduating soon! Convocation on 2nd December 2008.

Cell Group Discussion

2008-10-12T22:26:00.000-07:00

I am in the midst of designing cell group material for my church. After I have complete some of the discussion matterial, I think I'll post it up here to share with the world. So, keep an eye for the update!

Busy... Busy... Busy...

2008-10-10T17:21:00.000-07:00

Sorry friends,

For the past few months, I have been so busy with so many things at church. We just finished our church camp and a series of seminar. I guess, I will be busy till the end of the year.

Let me just post some of the photos that we took in the camp and some other activities so that my youth group can download from here.

Camp lobby.... Old and Dusty

Fellowship of the Ring

Hmm.. like enjoying themselves...

Cycling queen

Like never cycle before

Love and harmony

Natural Tendency

2008-07-21T17:45:00.000-07:00

Last few days, I am a group of BCM students went to Ipoh for mission purpose. Indeed, we have a wonderful time there. I always enjoy going Ipoh for mission because of the people there. Sometime i think why they need people like us to go, they have such a powerful community testimony. Perhaps, it is more like to bless us than needing our help.

As we reach Ipoh, the Christian community receive us so warmly. I could feel the love of Christ among their midst. Although this is not the first time serving in Ipoh community, I am still amazed at their hospitality and love. They respect and honor the pastors. We as so called "future" pastor were being treated the same way.

Then we continued our tasks there in Ipoh. We serve the children, youth, adult and senior adult. As we preach and teach, I found a common theme within our content. It is the natural tendency for Christian to love. Our lecturer preach that mission is a natural outflow of the Church. I preach on mission is built into humanity using different gifts, Our team leader preach on mission as our natural reaction to share life.

In our sharing, we need not to condemn the people that if they don't share the gospel, the people will be thrown to hell. The people knew this truth. What we share is to encourage them to press on in showing love and care to those around them. That itself is a natural reaction of Christian Lifestyle. As you become a Christian, there will be a sudden change in your life, if not, at least it will slowly take place. Somehow, your capacity to love will increase, you will become more compasion, and justice is absolute in your life.

People around us actually aware of all the changes that happened in our life. Whether good or bad, people can see. Even more amazing, God will actually add colours to all the changes. This is what I called, "Gifts" from God. After accepted the Lord, most of us will experience certain changes in life. Either we felt relieved that we are set free from the bondage of sins, or we will become more active in life because we know our purpose on earth.

However, our life become more difficul to live compare to the past. The reason is that our capacity of love increase. We started to acknowledge absolute truth. We understand that our lives have moral consequences. So, naturally, our life will change. This change is called "Sanctification."

Throughout the process of sanctification, God will put gifts into our life. God will allow us to go through certain experiences, could be good or bad. God will be at the background, colouring our life. Mission in some way, is to portray this portrait that God has paint in our life, to people surrounding us. We share our life story to our friends, neighbours and relatives. Therefore, it will be as natural as we chit chat over the coffee shop.

Our natural tendency to love and care is one of our main witness to the world. Let us continue to do the very little things, love more, care more and fight for justice more. God will be at the back, drawing the best out of us. Let our life be a natural outflow of God's love. Then, people will see us and praise our Father in heaven.

Spiritual Disciplines: Door to Liberation

2008-07-12T22:36:00.001-07:00

Currently I am teaching "Spiritual Discipline" in my church. Those who are interested, our class start at 11.30am, Education Block Level 5, every Sunday. This book, "Celebration of Discipline" by Richard Foster was one of my reference book. Let me share a little bit of my study in this post.

A Study base on "Celebration of Discipline" (Richard Foster)

The intention of spiritual discipline is to invite us to explore the spiritual realm. In today world, spirituality is becoming superficial. Spiritual discipline is to call us to move from surface living into the depths.Spiritual discipline is not for spiritual giants, but for ordinary human beings.

Spiritual discipline is to help ordinary people experiencing God transforming power which liberate themselves from the bondage of worldly desire.

Spiritual disciplines are not hard to practices but require time and effort. As you practice spiritual discipline, you will face two struggles:

The philosophic mind of human. We tend to doubt our ability of reaching beyond the physical world. We try to use intellectual and rationality to limit our understanding of the unseen spiritual realm.
Practical of spiritual disciplines. We don’t really know how to practice spiritual disciplines. There are not much practical steps that stated in the Bible to lead us in practicing spiritual disciplines.

Spiritual habits set us free from the ingrained habits of sin. When we were sinners, our lives were live under the condition of sin. The natural motions of our lives are sinful. Sin is part of the internal structure of our lives. We are being trapped by sin.

We try to use will power and determination to overcome sin. However, such power will only result in temporal success. The Bible teaches us to deal with our mind and our inner self rather than just physical victory.

Spiritual discipline is to help us re-direct our focus to God, relying on His power and grace to transform us. God has given us the disciplines of the spiritual life as a means of receiving His grace. However, take note that the spiritual discipline by itself can do nothing. They are only a means, a channel for God’s grace. The practices do not produce transformation, but it will put us in the place where we can receive God’s grace for transformation.

However, there is a danger to put the spiritual disciplines higher than God. This becomes legalism. The spiritual disciplines are not laws; they are only God given means for us to break out from our sinful condition and into a new condition where we can receive God’s abundance grace. Our heart and attitude towards the spiritual disciplines will affect our spiritual life.

Dealing with People who are hurt in the Church

2008-07-02T16:53:00.000-07:00

Recently I was bombarded with this question, how to help those who are in hurt? When you face certain situation, sometimes you might act in certain way out of the norm. People who are hurt will do things beyond our expectations. So, as a church, how should we respond to these people. At one hand, we do not want to condone the wrong things they are doing. Perhaps during their hurtful time, they sin excessively. On the other hand, we know that they are suffering with the pain in their heart, and if we come straight to them, it might not able to help them at all.

As a Christian, if you see your brother/sister, facing difficulties in life, and he/she make certain decision or conclusion that you think is wrong, what will you do? If after you have try persuading yet it doesn't seems to help, what will you do next? On top of that, you find that people in the church started spreading rumours about what this brother/sister did, how do suggest to manage the situtation?

I welcome discussion from anyone who are reading this post. Put your comment in.

Reflecting My Journey as the Student Council President in BCM

2008-06-27T08:52:00.000-07:00

Last Wednesday was my college's Student Council Annual General Meeting. We elected the new president and the new board of Student Council for the year 2008/09. First of all, congratulation to the new president, M. C. and the rest of the elected body. This board is indeed an opportunity for you to serve in another capacity. Take it with all your heart as it will reflect your ministry philosophy in the future.

After the election, I began to reflect my term as the Student Council president. Well, I can just say I learned some hard truths in life. There were high and low times as a president of the student body. Just as I learn to lead, I also learn to obey and trust God's people.

After a year of presidential, I have to admit I am so limited and imature in many ways. I thought I can do many things, but actually I can't. I realize there are things beyond our grasp, and we could hardly control. I thought I can challenge the student to be motivated about school's activities, but I ended up feeling passive about the school.

For me, it was a real struggle between benefit and values. I know that being able to lead as a president is an opportunity and I will be learning many values of life. However, as I face with pressure from different faces, struggling with school work, I begin to ask the question of "benefit." "Do I really have to do it? Why me? What benefit will I again afterall? Isn't there are people more capable than me in the school?"

I took time going through these questions, and I push myself to the core of it. "Who are you, Victor? Who has brought you here? Who you are serving?" As I question my own belief system, this indeed was the darkest fear in my life. It is a question of principle of life. It really push me to the limit when I started the "WiFi" system in the school. I almost giving up and really wanted to throw all my credibility out of the window and shout to the school, "Please Don't Find Me Anymore!"

However, God was merciful. He took me into the desert, and let me learn the lesson of submission that is above "duty." He then put a conviction into my heart; "Serve people, Serve God." I realize how far I am from that verse simply commandment. It was really tough but God was not absent. He was there and he led me through the wilderness experience.

If you ask me, is there anything you feel proud of throughout this year in the student council? Yes, indeed there are! My team of committee help to organize events such as Graduation Salute (Party for graduates), BCM Day (Food and Fun Fair), Festival Celebration (e.g. Christmas), WiFi system in the dorm and protecting the welfare of the student body.

However, if you ask me if there is anything you feel regret after a year of service? Yes, there are also. I lost my first focus when I step into the leadership position. When I was elected as president, I told God that there is one thing I must do is to re-create the spiritual dynamic that was once experience in the early revivals of BCM. Students will be so earnestly praying everyday, there were signs and wonders, the school itself impacting the surrounding community. Sadly, after I ended my term, I realize what I did throughout the year has far from my initial goal. Nevertheless, God is good. He has prepare the next committee to take the student body to a higher level.

There is another thing that I felt kinda miserable, is that I have not changed my attitude of laziness. Frankly speaking, being a president, you will decide whether to be busy one or an easy one. The direction is on your hand, and you choose your own plan. I have not taken my responsibility well to motivate the team and charge them to move into another level. Here is what I need to further work on with my attitude, my laziness, my leadership capacity and my vistion casting skills.

Nevertheless, I really thanks my committee for their effort to make our journey a memorable one. This is one way you that makes you remember the school forever. It is through our laughter, our tears, our conflicts and our partnership that we will make this school, a place that is special in our heart. From the bottom of my heart, thank you M.F., L.T., L.C., R.K., D.S., and M.C. (I try not to put full name to avoid unnecessary issues, but you know who you are). I also would like to thank our advisor, F.T. for her patient and willingness to guide our committee throughout the year.

To those who are leading voluteers out there (or perhaps the new board of student council), remember who you are dealing with. You cannot use the leadership system in the world to lead volunteers and BCM students. I have no answer for it, but you need to find out what is their need for motivation. As a president for a year, I realize that we need to first know who we are leading, then only we can lead well. However, this does not means that you can't ask commitment from them, but rather the opposite of it. It is really an art to ask commitment from voluteer that will give them a sense of motivation or significant. Remember, Jesus is our highest model. Allow Jesus to teach you leadership in a way that you never think off.

Invitation from Aloneness to Solitude

2008-06-19T23:57:00.000-07:00

“It is in deep solitude and silence that I find the gentleness with which I can truly love my brother and my sister.” Thomas Merton

As I study the invitation of aloneness to solitude, it is amazing to know that this invitation is the most fundamental discipline that moves us from the business of the world to the presence of God. It is through solitude that we are able to develop intimacy with God.

So what is solitude? This invitation invites us to be alone with God, laying aside all social and activities of the world, and find solace in the presence of God. Jesus himself practiced solitude. He went into the wilderness to be alone before he started his public ministry, went to the mountain to be alone before he select his disciples and went to the garden to be alone before he sacrifice his life on the cross.

What is the meaning to go from aloneness to solitude? Jesus calls us from loneliness to solitude. In our society today, we are filled with so many negative influences. We are trapped by these “negative voices” that put us into the temptation of self-rejection. We became addicted to the noise and crowds around us that we are so fearful to be alone. When we are alone, we feel lonely and empty.

Moving from aloneness to solitude is to find fulfillment of being alone with God. By changing and renewing our mind, we are able to break free from the fear of aloneness, and maintain the state of solitude at all time.

However, in the journey from aloneness to solitude is not without trials. We are so comfortable with our lifestyle. We want to be appearing important and significant to others. We want to be busy all the time. When we are call to be silence and be attentive to God, we will find ourselves struggling with our mind and thoughts.

As we allow ourselves open to God, there are many times we will face negative result such as dryness, depression and even lost. This is what St. John of the Cross called “The dark Night of the Soul.” As we removed all our false identity, being alone with God, we are forced to face our inner self. It is at these moments, God will nurture our souls. Our soul’s appetite will then change from the voice of the people, to the love and grace of God. We will no longer fear of being alone, but constantly experience the presence of God, even in our daily life.

I too face great difficulties as I journey into the state of solitude. I am a second child, with an elder and younger brother. Throughout my childhood, I have been crying for attention, do my best in everything I could in order to receive approval from people around us. As I face adulthood, I become so dependent on my friends.

When I practice the discipline of being, the question of ‘significant’ keeps popping out in my mind. God is dealing with my identity. If I were to strip off from all my credential, all my status, and all my achievement, who am I to God? I struggle to find my true self in God.

As I continue my journey to the state of solitude, I became aware of my selfishness in making relationship to people around me. I became aware of my perception of friendship which is really base on my personal benefits. I became so aware of my weaknesses which tear my self-confidence down to the drain.

However, God did not leave me there. After some time journeying to solitude, I found my true identity in Christ. My heart was filled with gladness that I was a child of God, love and care by Him. I was able to regain my confidence in life, not on myself, but on the grace given by God.

Today, as I relate to others, I can really appreciate those friendships. I can be alone with God and enjoy every moment of it. Although there are times there is the tendency to walk back the old ways, the temptation of the ‘significance’, and the feeling of loneliness still persist from time to time, yet, whenever I face such situations, I will be able to aware of it and move into solitude.

This invitation really helps me to understand many pilgrims who struggle with their life. It is because I am in solitude; I can see the image of God in the pilgrims’ life. I can relate with them in term of their struggles, but yet not being pulled down by their negativity because of my intimate relationship with God.

During my journey of solitude, I could pour out all my emotions and problems to God. Whenever I face difficulties with the seeker, I can come before God and pour out to Him. There in the state of solitude, God will hear me and help me regain my strength.

Spiritual Death is More Painful than Physical Death

2008-06-14T01:05:00.000-07:00

Today I am really shocked by the respond of a youth in my church. As I asking him to come to church tomorrow, he reply in the most unexpected answer. He told me he will never come to church again. I asked him why, but he told me there is no reason.

It is my greatest shock for this year to know that this brother gave up on church. So many questions came to my mind. Is it the church program that cause him to give up? Is it the people, pastor or me? All this while, this brother were so faithful in the church. But these few weeks, it seems many things happen in his life that stop him from coming to church. I don't want to write more about what is going on in this brother's life because he has already made his decision.

What I want to reflect today, is the pain in my heart. Last few months, my grandpa past away. My grandpa and I were very close together. People say I am the replica of my grandpa. Of course, the day he passed away, I was sad and grief. However, I know that he went to the place far better than this place.

However, today, my youth is giving up on church. The possibility of loosing his faith become higher as well. To me, this is as if spiritualy, he has pass away. However, not to a better place, but to a darker and wordly place. In the eyes of men, he seems to have more time now to enjoy his life. It seems to have less responsibles (no need to serve in the church) and life seems to be simple (no more rules and spiritual disciplines). Yet, in the spiritual realm, the person heart's harden and now even harder to come back to faith in God.

My heart felt so sad, till I could hardly speak. My body became restless and tired. I pray to God and crying in my heart. The sadness compare to the death of my grandpa is far greater. This is a fine young man, who have tasted the sweetness of Christ, yet forsake it to pursue his own life.

I can't write anymore. It is too sad... Please pray for me. Pray for my youth as well.

Fight to be SIGNIFICANT!

2008-06-12T00:37:00.000-07:00

After so many months without blogging, finally last Sunday I revived my blog. Surprisingly there are people following through my blog. If you are reading my blogs, I do hope that you will follow through my discussion. It is my joy to know that what I wrote would help you in your life. Although I have not right things that are too complicated, but sometimes, simple things in life have many lessons to be learned from. I also encourage you reader out there to give me comments, whether you agree with me or not, good or bad comments will certainly add life to this blog. Thanks for those who commented, your words are treasure to me.

Yesterday I wrote a paper on the six invitations of soul cares for my counseling course. One o the invitation of soul cares is the invitation of solitude. Solitude is one of the fundamental practice of Christian Spiritual Disciplines. If you are interested to know more about it, let me know by your comment, then I will write a blog on it.

The paper was my personal reflection on the six invitations and how it help me to be a companion for others. In the invitation of solitude, one of the main point that I stress in the fight of being "SIGNIFICANT."

People are fighting to earn their significant on this world. From young, we try to study hard so that our parents found us significant in the family. When we grow older, we try to work hard so that we feel being needed by the company and family. As we grow old, we try to play hard so that our children will see us significant to the family. However, when we study hard, work hard and play hard, and result doesn't turn to be what we expected, we felt frustrated. If the cycle goes a few round, bitterness will start to root in our heart. Then we will form what people say "low self-esteem."

The invitation to solitude call us to come before God and find significant in Him. Today, if I removed all your status, your credentials, your job, and everything, who are you in Christ? Do you have any sense of significant left on this world if you are called a "nobody" in the other people's eye?

Today, let me just invite you to come before God. As you come before Him, lay aside all your burden, your carrier, your responsibility, and just be you. Allow God to help you to find significant in Him alone. Then, you will be able to stand and face the world with the Godly-image.

Father's Day

2008-06-07T20:29:00.001-07:00

Today my local church (First Assembly of God Church, Pudu) had our Father's Day Celebration. We brought forward our celebration because next week is the closing ceremony for the ongoing Live to Grow Campaign. The picture beside is my father (wearing white shirt). He is really a joy giver in our family. I designate this post to my dad, the person I respect.

I really learned a lot from the speaker in today's message. He preached with the acronym F.A.T.H.E.R.

F - Family Man not Forgetful Man
A - Amiable not Accusing
T - Trainer not Terrorist
H - Head not Herd
E - Educator not Enemy
R - Revivalist not Recidivist

I have a good father.As I reflect upon today's message, I am glad that My dad really portray the above quality. He cares for the family. He is approachable. He teaches us to love our mother. He shows us how serious he is with his faith. He make decision in the family and he impart his value system to us.

Living in a healthy and lovely family, I grown up with a good progress. I really agree with the speaker that without the father's love, we will face problem with our identity, our social skills, our moral values, and our lifestyle.

So, all the fathers out there! Be a good father. Take responsibility. Don't just tell your children what to do, but show them with your life.

Children like me, be glad that you have a father on earth who cares for you. Uphold your dad in your daily prayer. May God bless the fathers around the world that they will be godly, matured, lovely, resourceful and responsible.

Happy Father's Day!

The Year of Change, 2008

2008-01-03T18:22:00.000-08:00

This is my first post in year 2008. I am glad that I am able to live at this century. This is the best time of the world, where God is doing tremendous work in Asia, especially in Malaysia. So many good things have happened throughout 2007, and best yet to come in 2008.

Anyway, at this age the world also face with more complicated problem. As I was discussing with a brother in Church, the evil one has not stop attacking the church, and he is getting even more aggressive than ever before. My prayer is that Christians be strong for the Lord, that this year we are going to strife through by the power of His Spirit.

There are so many goals for me in this year. But primarily, I must focus my theological studies so that I will be able to graduate by the end of this year. My hope is that I will be able to apply what I have learned and put it to good use for building up the people of God.

I think this year will have a lot of challenges in our youth group. There will be many decisions making that will affect the future of our church's youth ministry. I pray and pray that God will help our youth leaders to be visionary and be able to build a strong ministry of young people who are die-hard Christians.

To my fellow brothers and sisters in my local church (First Assembly of God), I want to express my greatest gratitude to you. You have make me a better person. I am glad serving the Lord together with you. May we have an exciting year in 2008.!

A Voice in the Desert

2007-12-18T23:44:00.000-08:00

These few days I was facing some real hard questions. Recently my church organized a few days of Healing & Evangelistic services. Wow, what can I say, the hall was full and packed with people. The services end up quite late due to long sermons and spiritual ministering.

I am quite disturb by the way this particular speaker share the Word of God. It seems that she allegorize the Word of God a little too far from the context, and eisegesis rather than exegesis. But what you know, the crowd loves it! People giving testimonies that the presence of God was so strong, and they were healed in many way (spiritual & physical).

As a Bible School student, I was trained to exegete the Word of God and allow the Word of God to speak from Itself. Now, I was wondering what has really happen in the service. After discussing with some of the church members and doing some deep deep meditation, I come to a rather shallow conclusion.

I think God may use many channel to help His people. However, I may foresee that God will discipline His people using many ways as well. I am concern that the people in my local church starting to chase after the so called "manifestation of the Spirit" rather than God Himself. It is the responsible of people to make decision for themselves. We cannot blame God or anybody else if one day, our local church members join some cults or heretic teaching because we expose themselves to such teachings without prior information.

Anyway, people are indeed incomplete and have many weaknesses. I too are weak and incompetent in many ways. Who am I to challenge a "Great Evangelist" who prepare the people of God for the blessing of the year? I can only be a voice in the desert, preparing the way for the truth, continue to articulate and voicing my concern in the church.

I agree that we cannot keep our members in a well, keeping them away from different teachings, trend and movement in the world, but we got to teach them well, help them to be grounded in the truth.

Well, God is still in control even though things are not right. I must learn to lean on God and allow His creative plan to shock me again and again. He is really almighty. You got to know Him more by reading His Words.

Family Members are Part of God's Plan too!

2007-12-14T16:29:00.000-08:00

Today, as I do my morning devotion, I read the devotional email that I subscribe at Purpose Driven Life website. The text was Luke 2:4-5:

“And because Joseph was a descendant of King David, he had to go to Bethlehem in Judea, David's ancient home. He traveled there from the village of Nazareth in Galilee. He took with him Mary, his fiancée, who was obviously pregnant by this time.”

Jon Walker (the author of that devotional article) explained that even Jesus have family to move Jesus into that Holy purpose. Jesus, son of the living God, yet was chosen to born in a simple and ordinary family. The father was a carpenter, and as a result, Jesus too became a carpenter before He started His ministry.

As I reflected upon what has being written, I come to understand that God may use anyone in my family to mold me and clashes with me so that I will be able to fulfill my purpose on earth. I come to understand that God purposefully put me in this family, to see the reality of a Christian life, to be able to balance my view, to be able to form Christ-like character.

My mother and father, they were not able to receive higher education due to the culture in the past, but they have demonstrated a life of love, discipline, self-control, and responsibility. My grandparents, although we have quite a generation gap, but they have reveal God's patient and persistence in their daily life. My brothers who have always be my "iron sharpener" and help me to keep myself on the ground.

There are many unhappy time in the family, but I just realize all this while, the conflicts and disagreement, made me to understand my role in God's family better. All this, God is not unaware. He has carefully plan and taking care of me. Thank you God for your wonderful providence!

I pray that God will continue to direct the course of my life, that I be able to help those around to be more Christ-like and fulfill their God-given purposes.

Next Year Resolution

2007-12-11T18:15:00.000-08:00

Finally, everything is over. Pass up my last assignment yesterday night. Struggle so hard to finish the paper and lastly I manage to get it done. Although the paper is rather shallow, but that is as far as I can go at the moment.

I have been discussing with my girlfriend about next year resolution. I have not yet settle down and reflect upon what the Lord has done in my life throughout year 2007 and what are the area I would like to improve next year. Maybe I should use this time since I am blogging my reflection.

This year have been rather challenging and adventurous. I tried many new things throughout the year: from Secretary position to President in Student Council, started taking jazz piano class, started teaching Bible study class in church, started sharing in the youth group (no license to preach yet), started the revival services in my local church, and started my first leadership training with the youth group. Wow, God has been gracious to me!

Yet, there are area that I wish to improve but have not able to do so in this year; I have not yet sign-up for swimming class, still lack of discipline in practicing piano, have not started learning mandarin, and still no discipline in daily self-study.

Anyway, I trust God will pull me through. In term of my love and social life, things have been very nice. I got to know my girlfriend better, and I know how to handle my self better. However, my social skill still need lot lot more improvement, especially in the area of negotiating. That will be my next year resolution.

For next year, I wish to improve my English, Mandarin, Greek and Cantonese language. I always believe that language play a major role in our mental development and also our social skill. I would also hope to learn counseling skills and teaching skills better. Hopefully, next year I will be able to teach more in Church and help more youths to grow in their spiritual life. I also want to improve my time management, and hopefully can spend more time with my love ones.

That's about it for my simple reflection. Details reflection got to do in secret :)

Hello, 2008!

Emotion Ecstasy

2007-12-05T19:47:00.000-08:00

Holiday just started. Things are getting pretty easy. Graduation salute and exercises have ended as well. Suddenly, something strange happen inside me...

Yesterday, i was having a wonderful time with my girlfriend, eating at a Japanese buffet. Things were fine, food were nice (actually more than nice, it was excellent!), the atmosphere was soothing, everything just fine. However, somehow inside my emotion, there is a sense of lost and hunger for something.

I was sharing this with my girlfriend, which ended up cause her to worry about me. I have no idea what is wrong. Perhaps is the food causing the chemical in my body to react which then cause my emotion to fluctuate. But it does not happen to the rest of them who eat the same food together with me. When everything went well, suddenly thoughts become so miserable and negative.

The worst thing is that, somehow, I enjoy dwelling in that kind of emotion. I was pulling myself down, and making myself looks very pity.

Today as I reflect back, I think this is what I called 'emotion ecstasy.' Actually, this is not the first time I experience this. At this moment of time, life became almost meaningless, everything seems to be purposeless and living on earth is only a path to survive. I think the cycle that usually happen with this kind of situation is:

fresh -> positive to work -> gain achievement -> sudden depression

People call this as burn out. I think is more like we as leaders at the top of our performance, we yearn for the care and love of other people. Perhaps I use the word "lust" or "deadly desire" for the words of affirmation, loves, touch, and time from people around us. It is not just burn out, but a temptation after some degree of achievement.

Thank God for putting people around us that they can keep us accountable. But we also need to bear the responsibility to keep our attitude, our emotion, and our integrity in proper condition. I am learning to handle myself. God, please help me.

How about those who are reading this? What do you think? Have you ever felt this kind of melancholy in life? What do you do about it?

2007-11-30T21:09:00.000-08:00

Leadership: Behind the Scene...

2007-11-30T19:08:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, we have a wonderful celebration with the graduate students. Many people comments that we did well and they enjoy the celebration. As I reflect back from the day we started planning for the graduation salute ("a celebration organize by the student body to congratulate the graduating students"), there are many things that I think we can further improve.
As leader, I think I would give myself a 5/10 as for my effectiveness of leadership directing the course of the student council committee. As a leader, there is a tendency in my heart to escape from responsibility by taking the excuse of delegation. To be frank, throughout the preparation of the graduation salute, my part of responsibility much have been delegate to other people. It is because of their effectiveness and hardship that made the event a success. I am glad that I was put into a team of responsible leaders.
There are area that I have not communicate well with the committee. Throughout the meetings prior to the graduation salute, we have many misunderstanding within our committee. I think this is something that would happen because each of us have different perception towards an idea. However, this should not be an excuse for me as the leader to provide a better and clearer communication channel so that conflict of decision can be minimize to the minimum.
There are also some ugly scenes happen throughout the preparation for the graduation salute. I think maybe because my personality and my leadership is not strong enough that cause such incident. They are some real "scary" arguments that shock me. People can become very emotional. Perhaps I am still naive and not used to the "tension" situation. I will need to learn how to handle emotional situation.
There is one thing I think we did quite well is that we trust those we delegate the responsibility to. I think it is important to follow-up what we have delegate, and we did pretty OK in this area.
Those who read this blog, I would like to request that you will put my in your prayer. Throughout the leadership in the student council committee, there are many tension within myself that I have yet to resolve. The temptation of power, the tension between glory and humbleness. Even as I post this blog, there is a tendency in my to use this as a channel to self-promotion. There are many area that can easily cause me to fall in my leadership. Please pray for me and advice me when needed.
I think this should be about it for my reflection today. Reflection helps me to see things better and putting it down to words would help me to organize my thoughts.

Streching My Limit

2007-11-23T20:49:00.000-08:00

My college term is coming to and end. Assignments due dates are just next week. Exams also next week. Really stress up now. Moreover, need to prepare for Graduation Salute, Alumni Home Coming, and Graduation Exercises praise and worship. Then at church need to plan next year program and follow through some on going projects. Work are pilling up.

What can I say, time is short, sweet or not, is all depend on me. Whether these things are going to built me stronger, or put me into a depression, is really up to me.

Whenever I looked at the vast sky, the wonders of God's work remind me again that God is almighty. The birds in the air remind me of God's providence. Although I am stressed up with my work now, God is still there in total control.

I have two choice, whether take this as challenge or take it as burden. I ask God to change my perspectives and attitude towards all these matters. I will stretch my limits to allow God's work be done in my life.

Church Split is one of the greatest sins of the church

2007-11-21T20:42:00.001-08:00

In today General Epistle Class, I learned about the teaching by John in 1 John. John had a very strong message on God as Spirit, God as Light and God as Love. As my lecturer commenting the verses till 1 John 3, suddenly he changed in his tone and emotion. He was saying that church split is one of the greatest sins of the church. I was thinking about the phrase that he mentioned and reflected upon the Bible, 1 John. In chapter 2, the author of the Bible talked about God as light, and how Christians should keep themselves from sinning against God by following His commandments. Then suddenly, the author changed the topic to talk about antichrist and false teachers both in chapter 2 and 3. The author seems to address the issue in the church that there were divisions in the church. My lecturer painted the background of the Christians in 1 John, that they were actually quite emphasize on the Spirit. They were people claim to have direct message from God and started to deny the truth of God, even the atonement of Jesus Christ. Then these antichrists were influencing other Christians to leave the Church.

Leaving the church is a sign of hatred among brothers and sisters. This is absolute contradict with God, where Jesus came to demonstrate God’s love. Leaving the church here refer to people who were not happy with the church, who not satisfy with the church, who have conflict with the church and decide to leave the church. These people in the eye of John are not from God. This is because if you are in God, you will live like Jesus. Therefore, there is no reason for us to justify hatred because Jesus never hated his brothers and sisters. Moreover, church is a family, and how can family members leave the family? Church is not a social club. It is a God’s family where Jesus is the head of the family.

Nevertheless, the author of 1 John understands that there will be conflict in the church. Just like a family, there will be different opinions, different method of doing things, different personalities, the church consist of many different people. Therefore, it does not justify for a person to leave his/her church if things just don’t go according to their way. John was rebuking his audience for loving only in their words but not in deeds. I think one of the reasons that church conflicts were not able to resolve is because we don’t really practice what Jesus mean by love. Just be reading 1 John helps me to once again reflect my attitude towards church and my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. I need to love them with the love of Christ.

The only reason I think we can leave is when a church is no longer a church. A good question to ask: What is a church? What does the Bible say about church? Well, buy some books and read about it.